It’s when you look at yourself in the mirror and realise you’re no longer that skinny anorexic. The one people said was too thin, the one people offered food and you turned away. The one who got questioned about why you wearn’t eating.
The one people worried about.
It’s when you look at yourself in the mirror and realise that you are something much worse. An obese pig. No your bigger than a pig. You’re a whale. An obese one at that.
You look pregnant. You’re out of control.
You tried to eat properly for four days but now you realise you can’t. You can’t eat properly because in four days you’ve already become fat.
You realise starvation is your only option.
You want to recover… but anorexia is all consuming. You can’t get better. You must starve.